The confused man looked up, “Coffee...just coffee...”
“Any kind of coffee, as long as its my coffee.” Fuji shook her head, hired help can be so annoying, she swore. She had only explained her perfect cup 10 times. Once should have been enough.
She reached for the tv remote and flipped on the movie, Detective Conan: Movie 20 was on, but it didn’t really hold her attention at all. The phone rang, but she ignored it.
The office was quiet, and her new lamp she had just bought was shining. A knock came at the door. “It feels like an eternity!”
A man entered almost knocking over the plant Charlie! He was yelling about something. Fuji really didn’t seem to care, she was too focused on something else at the moment, the latest mafia game, an anonymous round in which she was Godot.
“So the BO is probably PhoenixTears, Abs-, Jd-, but wait Jd- can’t be mafia if Abs- is mafia, what GM would do something so bad as that, she tried to read a message from the GM, but the person was anonymous as well, and leaving no hints to who the person even was. “Aww, man, I want to be BO if its that awesome!”
“We all do.” The voice of the coffee runner came quickly. “U-um, the shop said they are out of beans...so they don’t have any coffee.” The boy looked terrified, a coffeeless Fuji was not something to mess around with ever.
“I brought you some hot tea!” He said enthusiastically.
Fuji frowned, “I haven’t had my 17 cups!” She slapped the desk in front of her like those lawyers would in the game. 17 cups of coffee per work day, a rule Fujiwara lived by...
“Maybe we should search for some.” The assistant suggested...
“I’m really busy...” she looked at her schedule, and started to name the many things she still had to do... “But...”
The assistant nodded, “Coffee.” She nodded perfectly.
“We should go now!”
The search started, at first coffee shops, some apparently closing due to the missing beans! A horrible sight for any true lover of the dark aromas of the night. Now even her assistant was missing the taste, she hadn’t realized just how much this assistant enjoyed the coffee as much as she did herself.
It was good to know, but the problem was if they didn’t find any, coffee-less people were bad. Angered easily and work was almost impossible to finish.
Now the stores were starting to have signs, some saying the horrid words of ‘Sold Out’ and beans being sold on Ebay for the price that no one could afford.
“This is terrible.” People were shouting, starting to show off their true colors, as the coffee was out of their systems. People had fallen asleep when crossing the street even. The world was falling apart!
“Any ideas what we should do?” Fuji asked the assistant.
They shook their head. “It’s like everyone has become a jerk...”
“Well they kinda have.” Raiden sipped his tea happily. “Without coffee, its turning people into monsters!”
“So let’s start a coffee bean business.” The assistant piped in.
“With what, our good looks?” She frowned.
“Hey Fuji!” She heard a loud voice.
“Um hi...” she had no clue who the person was, or actually knew her name. “Can I help you?”
“Of course you can help me, you look upset, Fujiwara.” The person smirked.
That was quite suspicious to her, “And why don’t I know you?” She asked quickly.
“Not important...” came the quick response.
“Totally not creepy...” She whispered to the assistant underneath her breath.
A quick nod. “I’m selling something...”
“We’re not bu...” Fuji started, but was cut off by the assistant.
“We’ll take them all!” Fuji shook her head, she needed an assistant to remind her she needs to fire her assistant.
“That will be two thousand dollars.” The satisfied person grinned, waiting for the money.
“I’m a bit short...” The assistant whispered.
Fuji pursed her lips, maybe they just need to be murdered. She pulled out the money and paid. The assistant was handed golden coffee beans, by the time she was about to freak out, the seller had already disappeared.
“Well this sucks now, I was gonna use that money to buy coffee!” She groaned walking back to the office, now very poor. “I borrowed that money from the office.” She took the beans and chucked them out the window.
“Now why’d you go do that!?” The assistant asked, glaring at the boss.
“Because they are useless.” She slammed her desk. “Also you’re fired, but come back tomorrow so I can fire you again.” She left the office quickly. The assistant did as well.
The next morning they had both returned and they were both quite amazed at the giant coffee bean looking stalk.
“Like seriously, how has no one else seen this monstrosity?” Fuji wondered.
“Everyone but us went home for Christmas, plus DCTP headquarters is in a secret remote area no one knows about.” The quick answer shot out almost immediately.
“Well, yeah, I guess so, but still...” She looked at the giant coffee bean. “We could be rich if we grind this...”
“Or we climb it like that story Jack and the Beanstalk!”
“Well, yeah but this isn’t a story and we could like fall off and die.” Fuji glared daggers at the assistant.
“Yeah, but we’d go out with a bang.”
“Or we’d become another ‘murder’ for Akobo...”
“What’s wrong with that, maybe we could fall from the clouds to murder people...”
Fuji shook her head. “So how do we even climb this?”
“One foot at a time.” The assistant grinned.
Fuji decided she’d rather not figure out if it was a pun or not...
She grabbed it to make sure it was sturdy, surprisingly it was. She did exactly as the assistant said, one foot at a time.
The assistant followed her quickly. A golden castle sat at the top of the beans. The smell of coffee in the air, “Dude, this is absolutely amazing!” The assistant exclaimed.
They started to walk, the clouds like a giant coffee bean.
All of a sudden a black and white wasp-looking Naganadel swooped down and attacked the two explorers, Fuji screamed, as the white needle barely missed her.
The two took cover behind another bean, the great dragon flying around, searching for the intruders, calling out for its prey, ready to bring ruin to the humans.
It searched and screeched hurting their ears. “It’s so loud.”
Fuji grabbed a steel rod that was conveniently in their hiding spot, and using it as a javelin, threw it at the dragon, it missed, and roared as it attacked them!
They noticed the castle door opened and decided to head into the building. I mean what could be worse than a psychotic Wasp Dragon...”An angry Psychotic Wasp Dragon is angrier!” The assistant grinned.
“Or so you claim.” Fuji forced a laugh at the joke, even though neither needed the question asked.
“So where are we?”
They looked around at the strange hallway, it was too plain, in a strange way.
“Who are you!?” The loud voice rang out, surprising Fuji and the assistant.
“My name is Fuji...” she yelled as loud as possible, hoping to be heard.
“How did you find my fortress of coffee?” Came the booming voice.
“That person bought and I threw them!” She pointed at the assistant quickly. The assistant waved.
“Well I am the Giant of coffee, my name is Godot. This is my castle of moon lit deliciousness. Here...take this.” He almost squished them with a cup of his coffee.
Fuji unthinkingly jumped in, enjoying the aroma of blend 168, “To Paradise and back...” the taste was amazing, she couldn’t describe it, the assistant jumped in as well and began drinking.
“Mmm, I missed this so much!”
The Giant Visored Giant watched her swimming. “You’re too cute to drink, fine, join me!” He grinned. “And you can have your coffee back!”
The assistant blinked, “You were gonna drink us...”
He nodded. “Well you have two choices...”
Godot turns to Fujiwara, his face very serious, “Will you stay with me and the coffee beans, or shall we allow the people down there to have it...
Fuji frowns at Godot, “If we don’t give the coffee away, we will cause pain and suffering to those poor people” she said smirking, taking a sip of her coffee, then she pointed to one, who looked terribly distraught. “I can’t do that to those good people, some of them are my friends, and others will cause war and strife.”
The assistant let out of sigh of relief, he wanted to go back home as well. The giant Godot laughed. “Coffee, blacker than moonlight.” He started, but was cut off by the assistant.
“First off, that’s not the quote...” He was then cut off by Fuji.
“Dude, remember this guys a giant...he can like squish and eat you.” She glared, the assistant nodded quickly.
“Then you guys can go, and the spread the joy of beans all over the world.”
“Thank you, Mr Godot. For everything including teaching us the joys of Christmas and sharing.”
“Oh, I didn’t he laughed, your sweet, delicious, dark coffee brought it out.” With a wave of his hand they were back at the office.
“Well, that was weird.” The assistant frowns.
Suddenly a red portal opened up into the wall. “OUR BONDS GIVE US STRENGTH” was announced through the room. “Oh hey is that coffee!?” He grabbed a cup and poured the dark liquid.
“Father, I don’t think we’re in the right place...” Lucina’s voice rang from inside the portal.
“Sit down and enjoy the coffee, we could have gone into a world where there was none!”
Lucina listened and took a cup herself. “We have things to do, Father, instead of drinking coffee...”
Fuji clinked her cup with Chrom and they drank up til their hearts were content.
Leaving Lucina and the assistant to wonder what even was going on any more...
Merry Chromas to all and to all a good night!
Fuji frowns at Godot, “If we don’t give the coffee away, we will cause pain and suffering to those poor people” she said smirking, taking a sip of her coffee, then she pointed to one, who looked terribly distraught. “But I think we should keep it for ourselves...if there ever was a shortage, I might not find this place...besides let them suffer!” Little horns grew upon her head.
The people went to war, while Godot and Fuji sip their coffee. She smirks, “Hmm, maybe next year we should take their tea...” they clink their coffee cups.
“We toast to a beautiful friendship.”
“And coffee!” Fuji finished.
No one actually knew what happened to the assistant.
Merry Christmas, Fuji, may your bonds give you strength! <3