Here's a little something I found on another forum that was actually quite enjoyable, and I hope you enjoy it, too.
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington mid-term chemistry exam. The answer by one student to the bonus question was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
Spoiler:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct... leaving only Heaven and thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting, "Oh my God."
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 5:15 am
by hakkaino7
I've read this on bash.org/qdb
Still funny the second time I read itĀ
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 6:18 am
by bluekaitou1412
LOL XD
Whoever wrote that is a genius in my book!
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 6:26 am
by mangaluva
Epic... If only I could get away with answers like that without getting reported to GuidanceĀ
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 7:50 am
by Walbuls
lol i'v been reprimanded for describing an old guy as "the old fart", just thinking if i wrote something like this to that teacher....wow
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 9:56 am
by Eve
Umandsf wrote:
Here's a little something I found on another forum that was actually quite enjoyable, and I hope you enjoy it, too.
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington mid-term chemistry exam. The answer by one student to the bonus question was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
Spoiler:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct... leaving only Heaven and thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting, "Oh my God."
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 12:02 pm
by sstimson
This reply suggest Hell be hot, but to people slowly freezing to death, their Hell is cold. So the real question should be is a hot hell required or could it really be unbelievably cold?
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 12:06 pm
by mangaluva
In some cultures, Hell is a place of eternal freezing. In others it's eternal darkness, or to wander in nothingness. Personally I like the Egyptian version, where your heart is simply eaten by the beast Ammut and at this point you do not go to heaven or hell or limbo- you simply cease to exist, in any world.
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 13th, 2009, 7:42 pm
by Eve
mangaluva wrote:
In some cultures, Hell is a place of eternal freezing. In others it's eternal darkness, or to wander in nothingness. Personally I like the Egyptian version, where your heart is simply eaten by the beast Ammut and at this point you do not go to heaven or hell or limbo- you simply cease to exist, in any world.
sounds better already, I'd take non-existence over death any day
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 14th, 2009, 9:13 am
by mangaluva
Well, you do die first. You just then either go to eternal bliss or just nothing rather than eternal torment. Considering that i'm an athiest and don't really think anything happens anyway, nothingness is not really a big deal.
"I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it." I think that's a Mark Twain quote, but i'm not sure. Sounds like the kind of thing he tended to say, though.
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 14th, 2009, 12:08 pm
by Eve
mangaluva wrote:
Well, you do die first. You just then either go to eternal bliss or just nothing rather than eternal torment. Considering that i'm an athiest and don't really think anything happens anyway, nothingness is not really a big deal.
"I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it." I think that's a Mark Twain quote, but i'm not sure. Sounds like the kind of thing he tended to say, though.
He assumes it so, it's not like the dead told him so, and if he doesn't remember the suffer of those day, how would he know?
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 14th, 2009, 1:01 pm
by Mizzicco
I saw it at Bash.org. That student was the only one who get extra credit for that question.
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 14th, 2009, 1:55 pm
by mangaluva
BTW, this story's pretty similar so I thought I'd post it here:
An english lit teacher set his class a creative writing excercise. The students had to write the shortest story possible containing three themes: religion, sexuality and mystery.
The A+ story:
Spoiler:
Oh God, I'm pregnant and I don't know who did it.
Re: The Chemistry Exam Question
Posted: November 14th, 2009, 2:16 pm
by Mizzicco
mangaluva wrote:
BTW, this story's pretty similar so I thought I'd post it here:
An english lit teacher set his class a creative writing excercise. The students had to write the shortest story possible containing three themes: religion, sexuality and mystery.