Fanfic - Shinichi at 7 years old

[OneTruthPrevails]

EDIT: I took out the swearing so hopefully it is a more enjoyable read.

Hey guys I just finished my FanFic I hope you all can read it and give me a review.
This is my first one so please give me suggestions on how to improve.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5986187/1/Shinichi_at_7_years_old

[xpon]

okay......

so

Spoiler:

he is a wild kid that suddenly become a mysterious geek...

nice try.

if you want to make your readers laugh then you got me on that 

i really hope he can catch and kill that monster.

thanks for sharing anyway

[KaitoGirl]

Well, for make people laugh is good... But I don't like it too much... Well, just don't let that comments like mine beat you, besides, is your first work I don't wanna destroy it. Keep going if that's what you want. I liked the part when

Spoiler:

Yusaku threw him a book XD and also when he was chasing a squirrel. The boy really was a wild child.

Well, keep going if that's what you want